ABOUT US
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FAMILY
It was a tough journey to get our beautiful boys and it is no picnic having twins. But as hard as its been, I wouldn’t swap it for anything. My family means the world to me and my responsibility to them is something I take very seriously.
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TRIATHLONS
Having always wanted to complete a Triathon, in 2020 I started training. I started out with a sprint distance in 2021 and worked up to a 70.3 distance in 2022. I plan to complete a 140.6 in 2024.
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KAYAKING BASS STRAIT
In April of 2023, Don and I set off for Mainland Tasmania from Tidal River, VIC. Unfortunately bad weather prevented us from completing our goal but we still made it across Bass Strait and to the South East corner of Flinders Island a mere 60km short of our goal. Needless to say it was still an epic adventure.
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MEN'S WORK
I have completed Level 1 and Level 2 Leadership Training with the Rites of Passage Institute. I was also a facilitator for their Young Warriors camps. I have also completed facilitator training with Mens Wellbeing and facilitate their Common Ground programs.
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LIFELINE TRAINING
In 2017 I completed the Lifeline Crisis Supporter Workplace Training and volunteered at their call centre. The program and instructors were amazing and I am grateful to have had experience with this vital service.
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SUMMER CAMPS
From the age of 17 to 25, I was a staff member at summer camp programs almost every year. I played in bands, taught watersking and eventually became Activities Director. I had many great experiences being part of a team that created so many great memories.
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OUTDOOR LEADERSHIP
Prior to doing carpentry and engineering, I was an Outdoor Instructor. I enjoyed being outside, teaching people to navigate through the bush and helping young people overcome their fears to complete intense challenges. I had many adventures with some great people throughout my years in this role.
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THE DISCOMFORT ZONE
In the modern world our primal urge for comfort no longer serves us. Intermitantly seeking out and engaging in discomfort is the antidote to a lot of the aliments of the comfort zone. I aim to use this antidote myself and share with as many people as possible.
The Vision
I want every man to get in touch with his masculinity.
Part of masculinity is being capable of standing alone, but the magic happens when we choose to bring some people to our inner circle and support the people in our homes. The ultimate aim being to bring value to our family and communities in ways only we can. To become capable, responsible, valuable and authentic is challenging. From what I’ve learned, the following items are the keys to overcoming this challenge:
Progress - Understand that the human animal requires progress, not only attainment.
Connection - Build connection with loved ones. Also connect with my inner child; working towards my inner child feeling safe.
Accountability - Foster a close knit circle of supportive men. Men that hold me accountable and truly wish me well. I will need support as I traverse the undulations and plateaus of progress.
My Role
If I want every man to understand and practice healthy masculinity, then I need to lead by example. I want to support men on their path towards realising their potential. This means I have to be moving towards mine, across all dimensions of life. I will do this by:
Researching and dissecting masculinity, personality traits and the role of fathers. I want to identify principles that are useful and adaptable.
Reading and listening to experts across a diverse range of topics. This will include: evolutionary psychology, status games, stoicism and cultural trends.
Gaining knowledge in communication and learning styles; helping what I share to land better.
Creating experiences that put my resilience, principles and knowledge to the test.
The Warrior Mindset
Most of us are no longer needed to fight man nor beast.
We are no longer called on to be warriors - in the traditional sense. Yet the warrior mindset is still in use. It is sometimes adopted to "conquer" women, material success or physical prowess. This is partially due to the energy and focus that comes when channelling our inner warrior.
These pursuits can be noble or they can be hedonistic, failing to bring value in any real way. Regardless, adopting a warrior mindset can generate immense drive, resilience and focus. Today the predators and rival tribesmen are gone. So what do we have in their place?
ECHOS, SHADOWS AND GHOSTS
“Nice” you might be saying, ”I would rather face echoes, shadows and ghosts than a bear or a man with a sword”.
The stakes are quite different but our new enemies are formidable. They still take lives. It’s just a slower death.
Echoes from our past decisions are relentless enemies. It can be a daily battle to silence them. Also almost every hardship we face is usually made worse by a decision we made in our past. And Self-flagellation only makes the echoes louder.
The shadows of our parents or the traumas they imposed on us are difficult to see clearly. To escape them completely is even harder. It takes wisdom to prevent this darkness spreading to those around us. And if we are not careful we will spread it to the next generation, continuing the cycle.
The ghosts of our future goals and aspirations judge us. Our ego resists the discomfort required to achieve our full potential. These judgmental ghosts have racked up countless souls and will never tire.
It is up to us to learn and practice the skills needed to combat these new foes. For only the well-trained warrior that is willing to go to battle every day will prevail.
My wife and I had an extended journey through infertility. That journey broke me.
In my broken state I was trying to work, support my wife through her challenges and manage the normal life stuff. I was looking for anything and everything that might help me survive one more day.
After almost 6 years, my wife fell pregnant with twin boys and we were ecstatic and in shock. But we were exhausted from our journey through infertility - by far the most depleted we’d ever been.
With our boys on the way I knew I had work through my brokenness and strengthen my relationship with my amazing wife. I had to find some guidance on self-discovery and raising children.
My guidance came in the form of: Jordan Peterson, David Goggins, Jocko Wilink, Joe Rogan, Warren Farrell, Robert Green, Ryan Holiday, Tim Ferriss, Viktor Frankl, Jonathan Haidt, Esther Perel, Cameron Hanes, Michael Easter and Joe Desena - to name a few. I am so grateful for each of these wonderful people and their ability to make their knowledge engaging and accessible. Each of them have played a part in changing how I think and who I am.
Through their guidance I found the key to raising children. The key is learning about how I work so I can use that knowledge to attempt to change my behaviour for the better.
Because kids don’t do what we say, they do what we do.
If I want my boys to be strong, resilient, caring and hardworking then I need to be all of those things.
I’m glad I’m on the path, and I still have a long way to go. To stay on track I’m going to need to pay careful attention to our boys, my wife and my behaviour. I will never stop learning so I have the best chance of becoming a Mettle Man. In the process maybe I'll raise my two beautiful boys to be Mettle Men.
In short, all three of us are Mettle Men In The Making.
I certainly don’t have it all figured out, but if you like what you see, reach out.
If I am the right fit for you, I know we can map out your path to greatness and have you marching down that path excited for what may come.